I am excited by the list of names who could be the new owners of my beloved Dodgers. Among those who have submitted bids for the team are former owners Peter O’Malley and Fox Sports, Magic Johnson, Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban, talk show host Larry King and former Dodger players Steve Garvey and Orel Hershiser. And now two new names (joined together) have been added to the list of bidders for the Dodgers – I want these dudes to get the team! Also, what’s the deadline for new owners to take over? Will it be before the new season starts? Read more if you’d like…aka Dodger fans…
– Danica Patrick, and lot’s of her, preferably in Victory Lane – Seems like a pretty obvious thing to want since I’m constantly includin’ half-nekkid pictures of her on here, but I also reckon it would be a good thing for the Good Ol’ Boys of NASCAR to finish behind a lady for once.
According to NFL.com and these pictures, the world’s stupidest internet trend has now become a worldwide phenomenon. Pictures of people Tebowing have been taken at every one of the 7 Wonders of the World, and other famous landmarks all over the planet. And all this time I thought “Tebowing” was just another name for throwing a Pick 6. I guess we’ll find out in the NFL season finale this weekend.
In the meantime, here’s a bunch of idiots failing miserably at another stupid internet trend called “Batmanning”. Don’t even get me started on “Planking”…..
In case you’ve missed it, here’s one of the funniest pictures you’ll see this week. The dude on the left is Oregon’s All-American tailback LaMichael James riding Space Mountain before playing in the Rose Bowl. On the right, by the way, is the I.E.’s own Kenjon Barner, who was clearly having a much better time in the Magic Kingdom.
Here’s the one thing more amazing than that picture. Mr. James is one of the toughest motherscratchers you’ll ever see on a football field. How tough? Watch the video below – warning: extremely unpleasant content – and know that dude popped his elbow back into place on his own. He missed exactly two weeks after turning his wing into a cat o’ one tail.
A couple weeks ago, Jimbo copped to the fact that he cries every time he watches the first part of Finding Nemo. If you were wondering what makes a dude who all but laughs at his arm nearly turning into a maraca cry, you just found out.
While it certainly doesn’t suck to be LeBron, we’re guessing you didn’t go to work on Christmas and get heckled by a confrontational Santa. We had no idea that, after bringing joy to the world’s good girls and boys, the jolly old elf likes to drop the sleigh at the American Airlines Center and get his drink on at a Mavs game for a little r&r. Can’t you just picture the conversation at the Dallas concession stand?
“Okay, Beertender. Gimme tee martoonis…and…and…a G&T. Whaddya mean I gotta drink out of a plastic cup? What kinda joint is this – Stu’s house? My beard? I tink I lost it when I made that delivery at the agave factory in Jalisco. C’mon bro…didja think that suckers real? Hurry up. I don’t wanna miss Bosh blowing another layup.”
We assume those Wings Of Death aren’t really going to be on their backs come game time. Otherwise, Stu’s going to think he’s flashing back to seeing Canned Heat at the Swing.
Fans of college football and Tim Gunn have had something in common for years: a profound dread that can only be inspired by the words “Oregon Ducks show off new uniforms”. Prepare to spend January 2 – at least they’re not playing on National Hangover Day New Years Day this year – retching at that which Nike hath wrought this go-round. Coming next week to a Rose Bowl near you – assuming you live in the I.E., of course – it’s OREGON FOOTBALL TRAINWRECK 2012!!!
You’ll be delighted to know that, per Nike, “The new uniform provides enhanced thermoregulation and more durability with the inclusion of Nike Chain Maille Mesh…” Chainmail? Excellent! Introducing the Oregon offensive line..
Ahh, Christmas – A day for joy, hope, and basketball. Well, that and Laker Nation’s worst nightmare.
Let’s start with the second worst thing you can tell any Lakers fan (including this one): The Clippers are a better bet to hold up that giant golden basketball than the Lakers. Oh sure, they won’t do that this year, but – unless until Donald Sterling screws things up again – they’re in much better position to win their first ring before the Lakers tie the evil green empire with #17.
Take heart, Lakers fan. For the foreseeable future, at least we’re not going to be hearing the single worst thing we can ever hear: The Celtics win the championship. Thanks, for that Kendrick Perkins trade, Danny Ainge! Oh, and enjoy watching him in the Finals this year when the Thunder get worked by The Heatles.
Anyway, here’s a look at why it might be time to consider jumping bandwagons. In an attempt to avoid causing Laker Nation to break out in hives this Christmas Day, we’ll resist saying the words “Chris Paul” and “Lamar Odom” unless absolutely necessary.
Update: After putting the deal on hold, it looks like the NBA, which owns the Hornets, just killed the deal. For now anyway.
That having been said, the action moved up the 5 Freeway from Anaheim to downtown L.A on Thursday. For a while there, things were apparently changing forever in the land of Forum Blue & Gold: Chris Paul almost became a Laker, giving the team their first dominant point guard since…Magic?
Just a couple problems if the deal really does go through: (1) Who’s the new power forward? Derrick Caracter? Kenyon Martin? Look! Vlad Rad and Kwame Brown are available!!! (2) The other obvious move in Mitch Kupchak’s playbook is to make a run at one Dwight Howard, who wants out of Orlando. Just one thing: with both Pau and Lamar gone, what would the Lakers have to offer besides ‘Drew Bynum?
Y’all can officially stick a fork in the 2011 NASCAR season, but it didn’t end without a good ol’ fashion peddle mashin’ duel to the checkers at Miami/Homestead Speedway.
So I was spending my Monday here at 96-7 KCAL Rocks doing what I usually do, which is find great ways to waste time on the internet. After I checked my fantasy football teams and watched a bunch of FAIL videos of guys getting hit in the crotch, I stumbled across THIS LINK to the 2012 promotional calendar for the San Francisco Giants. You’ll never guess what I found. Unless you already read the title of this article. Or looked at the picture. Anyway, read more to learn all about it.