Tiffany helped her daughter on a diorama project for school. Stu’s kind and gentle soul decided it deserves an A, but Jimbo could only see a fat F.

What grade do you think this project deserves?

They’ve been talking about it for years, but now it looks like finally a movie on the life of Jimi Hendrix, called “All Is By My Side”, is in the works. Who’s gonna play him? Click to find out…

KCAL Rockers are busy, modern people. Between work, school, family, and – most important – watching football and drinking beer, we don’t always have the time to sit down and read every story in the newsosphere. Sometimes, we’ve just gotta rip whatever information we can straight from the headlines of the business, sports, entertainment, and local pages. That’s why your loving friends at 96-7 KCAL Rocks have taken it upon ourselves to make it nice and easy for you. Plus, we’ve saved you some time by jamming all the big news of the day into a couple easy-to-read “stories”. Some of them might even kinda sorta make sense.  Or not.

Here’s your Daily News Mashup for Tuesday, May 8th:

-Washington Nationals outfielder Jayson Werth broke his wrist just after it broke that pop singer Rihanna may pose nude for “Playboy.”* While most of us can surely understand Werth’s excitement (look at this and tell me you wouldn’t do the same thing), the injury comes just as the Nationals were finally winning. The guy could have at least waited till he got home from work, like the rest of us (hopefully) do.

-Bank of America will forgive up to $150,000 of Terrrell Owens’ mortgage debt. The former class clown of the still-ringless Philadelphia Eagles (40rty’s favorite team), is broke, and running behind in child support payments to three different women. To make matters worse, T.Owes is wallowing in the Indoor Football League. When you can’t even cut it in Canada, it’s time to hang up the cleats. Maybe he can fall back on his college degree in…marketing? Never mind. Stick to football.

-John Travolta is being sued for trying to have phone sex with a 911 operator. The “Battlefield Earth” star called 911 almost 20 times trying to get the local switchboard to talk dirty to him. While a woody can sometimes feel like an emergency, it’s certainly nothing to call 911 over. Not with the Internet so readily available. It appears Travolta got through to a few people, because a second person has stepped forward and decided to sue. Travolta hasn’t seemed this crazy since “Face Off,” and that was with Chief Crazyballs Nicolas Cage at his side.

*Before you go running to your favorite sports blog, no, Jayson Werth did not injure himself while playing Jimbo’s favorite sport, Yank the Crank. He is hurt, though, and even though many of us are Dodger fans, we wish him some sort of speedy recovery.

This is pretty cool. At their show in New Jersey this past weekend, The Red Hot Chili Peppers paid tribute to the late Adam Yauch (aka MCA) of the Beastie Boys with a live version of the Beastie’s “So What’cha Want” during an instrumental jam…

Like this! Here’s the little ol’ band outta Texas sneak previewing one of their new songs in a commercial for Jeremiah Weed. Enjoy!…

The Avengers is thee movie to see and it has sparked a rise in the popularity of shawarma. What is it? You’ll see the characters in the Avengers eating it in the last scene of the movie. Several hundred K-CAL Rockers will see our showing tomorrow night of The Avengers and get a glimpse of this dish. If you like meat, you’ll love shawarma. Read more…but use caution if you’re hungry!

KCAL Rockers are busy, modern people. Between work, school, family, and – most important – watching football and drinking beer, we don’t always have the time to sit down and read every story in the newsosphere. Sometimes, we’ve just gotta rip whatever information we can straight from the headlines of the business, sports, entertainment, and local pages. That’s why your loving friends at 96-7 KCAL Rocks have taken it upon ourselves to make it nice and easy for you. Plus, we’ve saved you some time by jamming all the big news of the day into a couple easy-to-read “stories”. Some of them might even kinda sorta make sense.  Or not.

Here’s your Daily News Mashup for Monday, May 7th:

-Miley Cyrus–mildly insane daughter of Billy Ray–stormed onto the court during last night’s Lakers-Nuggets NBA playoff game. America’s Oldest Tweenager has yet to talk about (or, even, admit to) her behavior, but it likely has something to do with the godawful, forsaken craptastic bomb of a movie she just released, “LOL.” Her public apology will probably look something like: “OMG SRY evry1 had 2 promote my muvie, LOL i <3 bsktballz <33333333333333333″

-The now-infamous walking disaster known as “Tanning Mom,” has agreed to star in a pornographic film. It looks like her lone stipulation was that she have no, um, “co-star,” giving herself 100% of the screen-time and the rest of us nightmares on par with visions of our own death. So far, no one knows which production company is filming the porno project, but, who can blame them for not wanting to take responsibility? The truly sick and twisted can click here for a short preview of “Tanning Mom’s” upcoming release.

-Olympic gold medal swimmer Michael Phelps has announced his impending retirement after this year’s Games on news that marijuana prices in California are in free-fall. The world-class athlete was publicly disciplined for marijuana use a few years back by whatever league or association governs swimming (and you thought Roger Goodell only existed in football), and it would not be surprising if California’s attractive pot prices drew him here for retirement. Plan on hearing him in-studio with Stoner Rob in the coming years, playing his pluggy sidekick, “The Psychadellic Swimmer.”* Just remember to pass it to the left hand side, Mikey.

*Get real: Phelps is NOT going to appear on Stu, Tiffany and Jimbo alongside Stoner Rob. He is quitting after the Olympics, though. Remember, the Mashup is a parody, anyone who takes the words written here as fact is a fool and should be privately ridiculed.

Wow, too many people dying too young this week. Adam Yauch, who you know better as MCA of the groundbreaking Beastie Boys, passed away today at the age of 47 after battling cancer for the last few years. They were just inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame last month, but MCA was unfortunately to ill (he did have “A License to Ill” if you recall the line from their song “Paul Revere”) to perform at the ceremony. Highlights of the ceremony will be shown on HBO tomorrow night. Kid Rock and members of The Roots filled in and performed “Sabotage” for them. Here are some more videos for you to remember MCA with..

Send your mom on a canopy tour with Jimbo and 4orty Courtesy of Navitat Canopy Adventures in Wrightwood. We’ll also put something in your moms mouth!! THE STEVEO, Lunch on us courtesy of Cinnamon’s Bakery in Wrightwood.
Send us an E-Mail by May 10th and tell us why your Mom (or if your kids are lazy, NOMINATE YOURSELF MOM) deserves this most excellent adventure to: yourock@kcalfm.com

It happens every year but its timing is awesome this year with the release in the U.S. tomorrow of the new Marvel Comics movie “The Avengers.” For your kids or for you, get your free comic book by reading the details…